Ok ladies... you've been there. Married for one, two, three, maybe even 25 years. There has GOT to be something that totally erks you about your husband. But we say "he is who he is and we love him regardless"...right? I would have to say that my current complaint about my husband has me concerned that my marriage may not survive. Here's the thing:
My husband is a "yes man" to everybody. His boss (somewhat understandable) his friends (who mostly only come around when they want something from him) and his family (who has never been there for him one second in his life). But what is worse, when someone says something about his lady (that would be me) that is disrespectful (from his family to his friends) he is all about "keeping the peace" instead of keeping her honor.
What the fuck is wrong with this situation? Well, I can tell you one thing. A friend of his questions my position as a mother to my son when my 3 year old has his nose broken (I wanted to sue the hell out of the school) and called into question my abilities as a parent (which is completely outrageous!). This man, this friend of my husbands, has had maybe ONE conversation with me in the ten years I have been with my husband, yet his attacks and questions (telling me I shouldn't sue the school because it is a Catholic School) were totally out of line and disrespectful. I cut him off completely. Nobody questions me when it comes to my child, that is MY child and I will protect him. My husband, on the other hand, tells me one thing and his friend the other.
I find on his computer, that we share for work, an open email between the two of them, where my husband is all "love you brother, have a great father's day"... I'm thinking to myself, "where the fuck is your loyalty?". If anyone had ever said anything in disrespect to my husband or dishonored him the way his friend did to me, I would have brought out the claws or just bid them farewell. Like Abigail Adams stood by her husband to her deathbed when she found out Thomas Jefferson conspired against her husband while in office to keep the fragile new nation out of war with France, I stand by my husband and feel with and for him.
This is something he lacks. So I am a bit pissed off, to say the least, in my husbands inability to honor me. Not that I need protection, but I'd like to think that my husband would take offence to someone belittleing his wife, yet this isn't the first time he has turned his back to "keep the peace".
Fuck that. There are times where you say "ok, let it go, keep the peace" but not every single time! Grab your balls up off the floor and say something!! I am constantly on guard for my child, making sure he has the resources available to him for survival, communication and life even at his young age of 4. I am always there to talk with him when he needs me and I never allow anyone to dishonor neither my son or my husband. So why is it ok for his family, his friends or a total stranger to say something to or about me (especially when they don't even KNOW me)?
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