You can go where you belong. Behind me. Anyone I let go of can stay there too. Some decisions were mine, others were made for me. Either way, things in life happen for a reason and I intend to learn from life's lesson's rather than turn a blind eye again. This year was difficult for many reasons, ones that are still painfully present in my mind yet I am optimistic that 2011 is MY year to be ME. My year that I will step up, step out and move on to a bigger, better and brighter future.
So Peace Out 2010. I have no more need for you.
-Rachel
Friday, December 31, 2010
New Years Resolution
I'm Gonna Make A Change,
For Once In My Life
For Once In My Life
It's Gonna Feel Real Good,
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .
As I, Turn Up The Collar On My
Favourite Winter Coat
This Wind Is Blowin' My Mind
I See The Kids In The Street,
With Not Enough To Eat
Who Am I, To Be Blind?
Pretending Not To See
Their Needs
Gonna Make A Difference
Gonna Make It Right . . .
As I, Turn Up The Collar On My
Favourite Winter Coat
This Wind Is Blowin' My Mind
I See The Kids In The Street,
With Not Enough To Eat
Who Am I, To Be Blind?
Pretending Not To See
Their Needs
A Summer's Disregard,
A Broken Bottle Top
And A One Girl's Soul
They Follow Each Other On
The Wind Ya' Know
'Cause They Got Nowhere
To Go
That's Why I Want You To
Know
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change)
(Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,
Na Nah)
I've Been A Victim Of A Selfish
Kind Of Love
It's Time That I Realize
That There Are Some With No
Home, Not A Nickel To Loan
Could It Be Really Me,
Pretending That They're Not
Alone?
A Willow Deeply Scarred,
Somebody's Broken Heart
And A Washed-Out Dream
(Washed-Out Dream)
They Follow The Pattern Of
The Wind, Ya' See
Cause They Got No Place
To Be
That's Why I'm Starting With
Me
(Starting With Me!)
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Her To Change Her
Ways
(Change Her Ways)
And No Message Could've
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make That . . .
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make That . . .)
Change!
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror,
(Girl In The Mirror!)
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
(Better Change!)
No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make The Change)
(You Gotta Get It Right, While
You Got The Time)
('Cause When You Close Your
Heart)
You Can't Close Your . . .Your
Mind!
(Then You Close Your . . .
Mind!)
That Girl, That Girl, That
Girl, That Girl
With That Girl In The Mirror
(Girl In The Mirror)
That Girl, That Girl, That Girl
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
(Better Change!)
You Know . . .That Girl
No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change)
You've Got To Stop It.
Yourself!
(Yeah!-Make That Change!)
I've Got To Make That Change,
Today!
(Girl In The Mirror)
Make That Change.
A Broken Bottle Top
And A One Girl's Soul
They Follow Each Other On
The Wind Ya' Know
'Cause They Got Nowhere
To Go
That's Why I Want You To
Know
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself, And
Then Make A Change)
(Na Na Na, Na Na Na, Na Na,
Na Nah)
I've Been A Victim Of A Selfish
Kind Of Love
It's Time That I Realize
That There Are Some With No
Home, Not A Nickel To Loan
Could It Be Really Me,
Pretending That They're Not
Alone?
A Willow Deeply Scarred,
Somebody's Broken Heart
And A Washed-Out Dream
(Washed-Out Dream)
They Follow The Pattern Of
The Wind, Ya' See
Cause They Got No Place
To Be
That's Why I'm Starting With
Me
(Starting With Me!)
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
And No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror
I'm Asking Her To Change Her
Ways
(Change Her Ways)
And No Message Could've
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make That . . .
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make That . . .)
Change!
I'm Starting With The Girl In
The Mirror,
(Girl In The Mirror!)
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
(Better Change!)
No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make The Change)
(You Gotta Get It Right, While
You Got The Time)
('Cause When You Close Your
Heart)
You Can't Close Your . . .Your
Mind!
(Then You Close Your . . .
Mind!)
That Girl, That Girl, That
Girl, That Girl
With That Girl In The Mirror
(Girl In The Mirror)
That Girl, That Girl, That Girl
I'm Asking Her To Change
Her Ways
(Better Change!)
You Know . . .That Girl
No Message Could Have
Been Any Clearer
If You Wanna Make The World
A Better Place
(If You Wanna Make The
World A Better Place)
Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change
(Take A Look At Yourself And
Then Make A Change)
You've Got To Stop It.
Yourself!
(Yeah!-Make That Change!)
I've Got To Make That Change,
Today!
(Girl In The Mirror)
Make That Change.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Tainted Love
Sometimes I feel I've got to run away
I've got to get away
From the pain you drive into the heart of me.
the love we share seems to go nowhere
And I've lost my light for I toss and turn -
I can't sleep at night.
Once I ran to you
now I'll run from you
This tainted love you've given -
I give you all a girl could give you.
Take my tears and that's not living - oh
tainted love - tainted love.
Now I know I've got to run away
I've got to get away.
You don't really want it any more from me -
To make things right I need someone to hold me tight
And you'll think love is to pray but I'm sorry I don't pray that way
Once I ran to you
now I'll run from you
Don't touch me please - I cannot stand the way you tease.
I love you though you hurt me so
Now I'm gonna pack my things and go.
Tainted love.
I've got to get away
From the pain you drive into the heart of me.
the love we share seems to go nowhere
And I've lost my light for I toss and turn -
I can't sleep at night.
Once I ran to you
now I'll run from you
This tainted love you've given -
I give you all a girl could give you.
Take my tears and that's not living - oh
tainted love - tainted love.
Now I know I've got to run away
I've got to get away.
You don't really want it any more from me -
To make things right I need someone to hold me tight
And you'll think love is to pray but I'm sorry I don't pray that way
Once I ran to you
now I'll run from you
Don't touch me please - I cannot stand the way you tease.
I love you though you hurt me so
Now I'm gonna pack my things and go.
Tainted love.
My Little Sister; a Guest Bloggers Story.
Guest Blogger; Ruth from "let's be splendid about this..." shares some of her experiences with us!
So, I have a younger sister, she's 16 now. I'm the first to admit we argue and fight as much as any other pair of siblings. I'm not proud of it and whenever we argue, I feel horribly guilty afterwards. But she is my little sister, and as such, I love her, whether we are racing each other in the pool, playing the PlayStation's or watching The Simpsons; her favorite show. I am protective of her.
Now, she is mildly autistic. She finds it difficult to adjust to new routines, she doesn't like loud noises, she gets easily freaked out and socially, she finds it difficult to fit in. However, she is able to go to a mainstream school. This mean's she faces mainstream problems- like bullying for example. It'd be difficult to find someone who hasn't been subjected to it. But my sister is not able to defend herself, like most kids. She doesn't understand but she knows she is being made fun of. I couldn't protect her; I was in a different school. She went to one with better integration facilities. But the amount of times she came home in tears, because of some stupid little bitch or group of dickhead boys had been teasing her made me want to march myself right up to them and yell until I was hoarse.
It probably wouldn't do much good. For all I know, they would laugh at me and make fun of her more. My solution to dealing with little shits like that is to simply walk away. I have never felt the urge to bully someone or make his or her life miserable like that. And to pick on someone who is more vulnerable that most, is the most cowardly act I can think of.
One time, I had to pick my sister up from school and bring her home on the train (she won't go by herself, she is unsure of public transport). So I did and as we were sitting there, a group of boys walked past from her school. She stiffened. They pointed and laughed, knowing that this is all it would take to stir her. I felt like saying "You think you're so funny! I'd like to see where you are in five years time; sniffing paint and on the dole I bet!" Or something along those lines. Even just to say "Fuck off!" would have been bliss. Not a very witty retort, is it? That's why I sat down again. All I could do intone to my sister was "Ignore them, they're not worth it." And she looked at me and said "I know, I just ignore them now".
This year has been much better. She talks about her friends she sits with at lunch, and there have been much less teary days. She's a lot stronger than some people think. But what makes me sad is that people like these boys will always exist. And not everyone is as strong as my sister.
-Ruth-
I want to thank you, Ruth, for sharing your sisters story. I am well aware of the affects of autism and know how difficult it can be on the child and their life. And children like those you describe in your post come from home where I wish I could beat the living shit out of the parents. Because, let's face it, it all starts at home. You are right; little shits like that will always exist and I am so glad to hear that your sister has the ability to rise above them, know it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with their own self esteem (or lack of it). And it also saddens me to know that there aren't other suffering as she or the effects of bullying that cannot see past the assholes the bullies are. It's one of my biggest peeves. My son is five and already suffering the effects of being bullied. They start younger every year. And while a good "FUCK YOU!" might feel good, it does nothing but make matters worse. So kudos to you, your sister, your family. You have grace, class and poise that will win this battle.
So, I have a younger sister, she's 16 now. I'm the first to admit we argue and fight as much as any other pair of siblings. I'm not proud of it and whenever we argue, I feel horribly guilty afterwards. But she is my little sister, and as such, I love her, whether we are racing each other in the pool, playing the PlayStation's or watching The Simpsons; her favorite show. I am protective of her.
Now, she is mildly autistic. She finds it difficult to adjust to new routines, she doesn't like loud noises, she gets easily freaked out and socially, she finds it difficult to fit in. However, she is able to go to a mainstream school. This mean's she faces mainstream problems- like bullying for example. It'd be difficult to find someone who hasn't been subjected to it. But my sister is not able to defend herself, like most kids. She doesn't understand but she knows she is being made fun of. I couldn't protect her; I was in a different school. She went to one with better integration facilities. But the amount of times she came home in tears, because of some stupid little bitch or group of dickhead boys had been teasing her made me want to march myself right up to them and yell until I was hoarse.
It probably wouldn't do much good. For all I know, they would laugh at me and make fun of her more. My solution to dealing with little shits like that is to simply walk away. I have never felt the urge to bully someone or make his or her life miserable like that. And to pick on someone who is more vulnerable that most, is the most cowardly act I can think of.
One time, I had to pick my sister up from school and bring her home on the train (she won't go by herself, she is unsure of public transport). So I did and as we were sitting there, a group of boys walked past from her school. She stiffened. They pointed and laughed, knowing that this is all it would take to stir her. I felt like saying "You think you're so funny! I'd like to see where you are in five years time; sniffing paint and on the dole I bet!" Or something along those lines. Even just to say "Fuck off!" would have been bliss. Not a very witty retort, is it? That's why I sat down again. All I could do intone to my sister was "Ignore them, they're not worth it." And she looked at me and said "I know, I just ignore them now".
This year has been much better. She talks about her friends she sits with at lunch, and there have been much less teary days. She's a lot stronger than some people think. But what makes me sad is that people like these boys will always exist. And not everyone is as strong as my sister.
-Ruth-
I want to thank you, Ruth, for sharing your sisters story. I am well aware of the affects of autism and know how difficult it can be on the child and their life. And children like those you describe in your post come from home where I wish I could beat the living shit out of the parents. Because, let's face it, it all starts at home. You are right; little shits like that will always exist and I am so glad to hear that your sister has the ability to rise above them, know it has nothing to do with her and everything to do with their own self esteem (or lack of it). And it also saddens me to know that there aren't other suffering as she or the effects of bullying that cannot see past the assholes the bullies are. It's one of my biggest peeves. My son is five and already suffering the effects of being bullied. They start younger every year. And while a good "FUCK YOU!" might feel good, it does nothing but make matters worse. So kudos to you, your sister, your family. You have grace, class and poise that will win this battle.
Friday, December 24, 2010
Some People Know Not What They Do...
Or they do and they just don't give a fuck... I happen to know some people of the latter... sucks, doesn't it?
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Excuse Me, Bitch
How many of you have been out this Holiday Season shopping for someone special? I am willing to bet that 90% of my readers are doing the crazy last minuet shopping experience. And I am guilty as sin, yes Ma'am, I am. I can't usually wait to give a gift so I prevent myself from going shopping until the very last second. But this yields the ugly truth of the season. Fuck all the "Merry Christmas'", "Happy Holidays" "Happy Hanukkah" or whatever, it is every Bitch for themselves out there! The men are so pissed off they're being dragged out AGAIN with the woman for MORE shopping (like she has MORE TO DO) and the woman? Well they just run you the fuck over like you don't even take up space or occupy it. The best are the ones who pretend they don't know where the LINE begins and jumps all the way in front of the already pissed off and irritated crowd, and then it ends in one of two ways. The person next in line flips the fuck out or the cashier has to tell the person to go to the back of the line. Either one ends badly with someone using the "F" word more than once and irritating the line of people even more.
Case in point on subject #1; I'm walking out of the sports store after waiting in line for a half hour to by ONE jersey, and as I am walking out, this big fat ass of a woman just slams into me, knocking me into the glass doorway and keeps walking. There is NO WAY she didn't know she did that; I'm so sorry your fat ass can't fit through a double doorway, but holy shit, do you HAVE to knock the little people down on your way in? Dude, I fuckin' lost it. She had been person #3 on my slap list and once I hit #3, I've hit tilt. I turned and yelled at her "Merry Christmas Bitch, don't forget to say 'Excuse me' next time your fat ass decides to knock someone into a wall".
Yes people. I did say that. I was pissed. And, as a previous post stated; it is the MOST FUCKED UP time of year. Screw that, no more nice me. Thank GOODNESS I am finished with my shopping as of today. I can't take these mall rats any longer.
The next case in point was in the same store as I was waiting in line. The line pillar said "Line starts here" and there were about 20 people in line, I was second. Another woman, older I have to admit, standing behind some
one at check out, I just KNEW was trying to get her way in and out without anyone in line noticing. Unlike my previous weekly post where I had to shout at the woman that there was a line, the clerk actually told her she needed to get to the back of the line. "oh, there's a line?" she said, like she didn't know. Laughably, the person in front of me says "oh com'on now stupid. You don't think for one second we believe you didn't know that. It's Christmas for CHRISTS sake! Get to the back of the line and wait your turn". If I could have hugged that woman, I would have but who knows if she would have pulled a gun on me or what; you never know these days. Still, cussing and moaning the entire way to the back of the line, the rest of us were just smirking at her like "looser, get serious".
Victory!!!!!
Case in point on subject #1; I'm walking out of the sports store after waiting in line for a half hour to by ONE jersey, and as I am walking out, this big fat ass of a woman just slams into me, knocking me into the glass doorway and keeps walking. There is NO WAY she didn't know she did that; I'm so sorry your fat ass can't fit through a double doorway, but holy shit, do you HAVE to knock the little people down on your way in? Dude, I fuckin' lost it. She had been person #3 on my slap list and once I hit #3, I've hit tilt. I turned and yelled at her "Merry Christmas Bitch, don't forget to say 'Excuse me' next time your fat ass decides to knock someone into a wall".
Yes people. I did say that. I was pissed. And, as a previous post stated; it is the MOST FUCKED UP time of year. Screw that, no more nice me. Thank GOODNESS I am finished with my shopping as of today. I can't take these mall rats any longer.
The next case in point was in the same store as I was waiting in line. The line pillar said "Line starts here" and there were about 20 people in line, I was second. Another woman, older I have to admit, standing behind some
one at check out, I just KNEW was trying to get her way in and out without anyone in line noticing. Unlike my previous weekly post where I had to shout at the woman that there was a line, the clerk actually told her she needed to get to the back of the line. "oh, there's a line?" she said, like she didn't know. Laughably, the person in front of me says "oh com'on now stupid. You don't think for one second we believe you didn't know that. It's Christmas for CHRISTS sake! Get to the back of the line and wait your turn". If I could have hugged that woman, I would have but who knows if she would have pulled a gun on me or what; you never know these days. Still, cussing and moaning the entire way to the back of the line, the rest of us were just smirking at her like "looser, get serious".Victory!!!!!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
So I'll be on my way...
Wrap me in a bolt of lightning
Send me on my way still smiling
Maybe that's the way i should go
Straight into the mouth of the unknown
Left the spare key on the table
Never really thought i'd be able to say
I merely visit on the weekend
I lost my whole life and a dear friend
I've said it so many times
I would change my ways
No never mind
God knows i've tried
Call me a sinner call me a saint
Tell me it's over i'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite call me the worst
Tell me it's over i don't want you to hurt
It's all that i can say so i'll be on my way
I finally put it all together
But nothing really lasts forever
I had to make a choice that was not mine
I had to say goodbye for the last time
I kept my whole life in suitcase
Never really stayed in one place
Maybe that's the way it should be
You know i've led my life like a gypsy
I've said it so many times
I would change my ways
No never mind
God knows i've tried
Call me a sinner call me a saint
Tell me it's over i'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite call me the worst
Tell me it's over i don't want you to hurt
It's all that i can say so i'll be on my way
I'll always keep you inside
You healed my heart and my life
And you know i tried
Call me a sinner call me a saint
Tell me it's over i'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite call me the worst
Tell me it's over i don't want you to hurt
It's all that i can say so i'll be on my way
So i'll be on my way so i'll be on my way
Send me on my way still smiling
Maybe that's the way i should go
Straight into the mouth of the unknown
Left the spare key on the table
Never really thought i'd be able to say
I merely visit on the weekend
I lost my whole life and a dear friend
I've said it so many times
I would change my ways
No never mind
God knows i've tried
Call me a sinner call me a saint
Tell me it's over i'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite call me the worst
Tell me it's over i don't want you to hurt
It's all that i can say so i'll be on my way
I finally put it all together
But nothing really lasts forever
I had to make a choice that was not mine
I had to say goodbye for the last time
I kept my whole life in suitcase
Never really stayed in one place
Maybe that's the way it should be
You know i've led my life like a gypsy
I've said it so many times
I would change my ways
No never mind
God knows i've tried
Call me a sinner call me a saint
Tell me it's over i'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite call me the worst
Tell me it's over i don't want you to hurt
It's all that i can say so i'll be on my way
I'll always keep you inside
You healed my heart and my life
And you know i tried
Call me a sinner call me a saint
Tell me it's over i'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite call me the worst
Tell me it's over i don't want you to hurt
It's all that i can say so i'll be on my way
So i'll be on my way so i'll be on my way
If You Only Knew
If you only knew
I'm hanging by a thread
The web I spin for you
If you only knew
I'd sacrifice my beating
Heart before I'd lose you
I still hold onto the letters
You returned
I swear I've lived and learned
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, if you only knew
If you only knew
How many times I counted
All the words that went wrong
If you only knew
How I refuse to let you go,
Even when you're gone
I don't regret any days I
Spent, nights we shared,
Or letters that I sent
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, if you only knew
If you only knew
If you only knew
I still hold onto the letters
You returned
You help me live and learn
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, believe in is you
I still believe in you
Oh, if you only knew
I'm hanging by a thread
The web I spin for you
If you only knew
I'd sacrifice my beating
Heart before I'd lose you
I still hold onto the letters
You returned
I swear I've lived and learned
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, if you only knew
If you only knew
How many times I counted
All the words that went wrong
If you only knew
How I refuse to let you go,
Even when you're gone
I don't regret any days I
Spent, nights we shared,
Or letters that I sent
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, if you only knew
If you only knew
If you only knew
I still hold onto the letters
You returned
You help me live and learn
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep
Without you next to me I
Toss and turn like the sea
If I drown tonight, bring me
Back to life
Breathe your breath in me
The only thing that I still believe
In is you, believe in is you
I still believe in you
Oh, if you only knew
Sound of Madness
Yeah, I get it,
You're an outcast.
Always under attack.
Always coming in last,
Bringing up the past.
No one owes you anything.
I think you need a shotgun blast,
A kick in the ass,
So paranoid. . .
Watch your back!!
Oh my, here we go...
Another loose cannon gone bi-polar
Slipped down, couldn't get much lower.
Quicksand's got no sense of humor.
I'm still laughing like hell.
You think that by crying to me
Looking so sorry that I'm gonna believe,
You've been infected by a social disease.
Well, then take your medicine.
I created the Sound of Madness.
Wrote the book on pain.
Somehow I'm still here,
To explain,
That the darkest hour never comes in the night.
You can sleep with a gun.
When you gonna wake up and fight... for yourself?
I'm so sick of this tombstone mentality,
If there's an afterlife,
Then it'll set you free.
But I'm not gonna part the seas
You're a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You think that crying to me,
Looking so sorry that I'm gonna believe,
You've been infected by a social disease.
Well, then take your medicine.
I created the Sound of Madness.
Wrote the book on pain.
Somehow I'm still here,
To explain,
That the darkest hour never comes in the night.
You can sleep with a gun.
When you gonna wake up...
When you gonna wake up and fight...
When you gonna wake up and fight... for yourself?
You're an outcast.
Always under attack.
Always coming in last,
Bringing up the past.
No one owes you anything.
I think you need a shotgun blast,
A kick in the ass,
So paranoid. . .
Watch your back!!
Oh my, here we go...
Another loose cannon gone bi-polar
Slipped down, couldn't get much lower.
Quicksand's got no sense of humor.
I'm still laughing like hell.
You think that by crying to me
Looking so sorry that I'm gonna believe,
You've been infected by a social disease.
Well, then take your medicine.
I created the Sound of Madness.
Wrote the book on pain.
Somehow I'm still here,
To explain,
That the darkest hour never comes in the night.
You can sleep with a gun.
When you gonna wake up and fight... for yourself?
I'm so sick of this tombstone mentality,
If there's an afterlife,
Then it'll set you free.
But I'm not gonna part the seas
You're a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You think that crying to me,
Looking so sorry that I'm gonna believe,
You've been infected by a social disease.
Well, then take your medicine.
I created the Sound of Madness.
Wrote the book on pain.
Somehow I'm still here,
To explain,
That the darkest hour never comes in the night.
You can sleep with a gun.
When you gonna wake up...
When you gonna wake up and fight...
When you gonna wake up and fight... for yourself?
Friday, December 17, 2010
I Should've Listened
There's clothes all over the floor
I don't remember them being here before
Smell of perfume isn't here, why's lipstick on the mirror?
And still I don't understand
No pictures left in the hall, there's three new holes in my wall
Where the hells my credit cards, why's my wallet in the yard
And still I don't understand
Well now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, whys love gotta be so tough?
Should see the look on my face, my shit's all over the place
Why's this happening to me, why'd you take both sets of keys?
And still I don't understand
Well now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, Whys love gotta be so tough?
Well now I guess I should've listened
There's clothes all over my floor
I don't remember them being here before
There are no candles in here, lipstick still on my mirror?
And still I don't understand
Now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, why must life be so tough?
Well now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, whys love gotta be so tough
I don't remember them being here before
Smell of perfume isn't here, why's lipstick on the mirror?
And still I don't understand
No pictures left in the hall, there's three new holes in my wall
Where the hells my credit cards, why's my wallet in the yard
And still I don't understand
Well now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, whys love gotta be so tough?
Should see the look on my face, my shit's all over the place
Why's this happening to me, why'd you take both sets of keys?
And still I don't understand
Well now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, Whys love gotta be so tough?
Well now I guess I should've listened
There's clothes all over my floor
I don't remember them being here before
There are no candles in here, lipstick still on my mirror?
And still I don't understand
Now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, why must life be so tough?
Well now I guess I should've listened
When you said you'd had enough
A little trick I picked up from my father
In one ear and out the other, whys love gotta be so tough
A Father's Letter
The Guest Blog has already received numerous emails!! I found the following letter from a single father of a new baby girl to be the most touching. Written before the child was born, this father explains his fears and excitements as he waits for his baby girl to arrive.
Hey Princess! I'm writing you this letter a month before you are due to be born. I'm gonna save this for you until you are older so you can appreciate this more. So I hope you enjoy it!!
It's a crazy feeling while waiting to become a parent. I'm so excited, scared, but most of all happy while waiting for you to join our world. Its such an amazing feeling to honestly love someone so much without even seeing your face yet!! I just know you are gonna be so adorable and grow up to be a beautiful woman. Let me apologize before hand for chasing away all your boyfriends and being so protective of you. A father just can't help it! I want you to know that I already love you with all my heart. I always wanted a child and to become a father. I'm also glad it happened with your mother. Me and your mom have tried before and even though you were a suprise to us, we both wanted you more than you could ever possibly imagine. When we found out we were gonna have a baby everyone we told said they hope we have a girl. Your mom wanted a little girl and so did I. Luckily thats exactly what God had planned for us too! Soon as we found out about you we went out and got all these cute pink outfits to dress you in and this only added to our excitment waiting for you.
I am ready to be the one to guide you through this life. I will always be there for you no matter what. Im gonna protect you and provide for you everything I can. Mostly you will always receive my love. Its so amazing knowing that I had a part in making who you are and what you wil eventually look like. It's been unreal watching your mom getting bigger as you keep growing inside of her. I remember the first time I felt you kicking inside of her and I will be there to watch you be born. Hopefully your dad doesnt faint! Its been a long nine months and we are almost there!!
So I must admit my reasons for writing all this for you. As you get older you will learn that life isnt always the easiest thing and its not always full of happiness. Don't get me wrong, life isnt all bad, it's just that everyone has their problems that must be dealt with and its all about how we learn to deal with them. Me and your mom each have our own personal demons that we have to deal with on a daily basis. For myself, I can never be the father I am or could be if I dont deal with my own. I want you to know that because of you I choose each day not to falter along the way. I want to see you take your first steps and hear you speak for the first time. I want to be be there when you go to school for the first time and be there when you graduate college. Im promising you today that I will be there for you and will never break my promises to you.
I know this statememnt may be hard for you to understand, but you have played a big part in me helping myself save my life. Only I can do that for me you understand. But even so, You have given me the motivation, courage, and willingness it takes to finally battle my own personal demons head on, and like I said I will not let you down or ever stop fighting and give up.
So I would like to say thank you to you for bringing so much joy into my life. And always know that I love you now and will forever after.
Love,
Dad
Hey Princess! I'm writing you this letter a month before you are due to be born. I'm gonna save this for you until you are older so you can appreciate this more. So I hope you enjoy it!!
It's a crazy feeling while waiting to become a parent. I'm so excited, scared, but most of all happy while waiting for you to join our world. Its such an amazing feeling to honestly love someone so much without even seeing your face yet!! I just know you are gonna be so adorable and grow up to be a beautiful woman. Let me apologize before hand for chasing away all your boyfriends and being so protective of you. A father just can't help it! I want you to know that I already love you with all my heart. I always wanted a child and to become a father. I'm also glad it happened with your mother. Me and your mom have tried before and even though you were a suprise to us, we both wanted you more than you could ever possibly imagine. When we found out we were gonna have a baby everyone we told said they hope we have a girl. Your mom wanted a little girl and so did I. Luckily thats exactly what God had planned for us too! Soon as we found out about you we went out and got all these cute pink outfits to dress you in and this only added to our excitment waiting for you.
I am ready to be the one to guide you through this life. I will always be there for you no matter what. Im gonna protect you and provide for you everything I can. Mostly you will always receive my love. Its so amazing knowing that I had a part in making who you are and what you wil eventually look like. It's been unreal watching your mom getting bigger as you keep growing inside of her. I remember the first time I felt you kicking inside of her and I will be there to watch you be born. Hopefully your dad doesnt faint! Its been a long nine months and we are almost there!!
So I must admit my reasons for writing all this for you. As you get older you will learn that life isnt always the easiest thing and its not always full of happiness. Don't get me wrong, life isnt all bad, it's just that everyone has their problems that must be dealt with and its all about how we learn to deal with them. Me and your mom each have our own personal demons that we have to deal with on a daily basis. For myself, I can never be the father I am or could be if I dont deal with my own. I want you to know that because of you I choose each day not to falter along the way. I want to see you take your first steps and hear you speak for the first time. I want to be be there when you go to school for the first time and be there when you graduate college. Im promising you today that I will be there for you and will never break my promises to you.
I know this statememnt may be hard for you to understand, but you have played a big part in me helping myself save my life. Only I can do that for me you understand. But even so, You have given me the motivation, courage, and willingness it takes to finally battle my own personal demons head on, and like I said I will not let you down or ever stop fighting and give up.
So I would like to say thank you to you for bringing so much joy into my life. And always know that I love you now and will forever after.
Love,
Dad
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Bitches Unite!
Ok my friends, the time has come for your turn to bitch! I am opening up the Bitchography for you!
What does this mean?
In simple terms, I want you to be a guest blogger on the website! I am sure we all have things that we'd like to bitch and moan about and what better place than the Bitchograhy?! So, send me your stories! Write up a post and I will do my best to get it up! Also open would be the Q&A section of the blog where you can ask me a question in regards to certain bitchin' situations... like how to deal with a meddling mother-in-law, a work-aholic husband or a tantruming ten year old!
Send all posts and questions to rachel_mae@live.com. Please include if you would like to remain anonymous or if you'd like your name to be signed off on at the end.
I look forward to hearing your stories! I have shared just the tip of the ice burg of mine so lets hear yours!!
Rachel
What does this mean?
In simple terms, I want you to be a guest blogger on the website! I am sure we all have things that we'd like to bitch and moan about and what better place than the Bitchograhy?! So, send me your stories! Write up a post and I will do my best to get it up! Also open would be the Q&A section of the blog where you can ask me a question in regards to certain bitchin' situations... like how to deal with a meddling mother-in-law, a work-aholic husband or a tantruming ten year old!
Send all posts and questions to rachel_mae@live.com. Please include if you would like to remain anonymous or if you'd like your name to be signed off on at the end.
I look forward to hearing your stories! I have shared just the tip of the ice burg of mine so lets hear yours!!
Rachel
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Smile, it confuses people.
Have you even been in the middle of a nasty argument, stopped, looked and smiled at your foe? How confusing is that!! One second, you're calling them a "bitch" and a "backstabber" and the next, you are standing in front of them, smiling. Do this the next time you encounter your "bitch". If I had done this in one or more occasions, I would have really turned the tides of the outcome. I bet, in all honesty, I would have burst out laughing. Knowing what I know now, I laugh at myself for being so blind in certain situations and a good smile, nod and a giggle could have really proven to be the right course of action. Not to make things better. Oh no. This is a Bitchography. I don't tell you how to make life simple and sweet. I tell you how it is and how things can go so very wrong when even a smile is made. Yes a sweet, kind smile can be twisted into the deepest manipulative tactic, so why worry? Just smile your way through an argument. There is really no point in continuing your your battle when you know the other person can't really hear what you are saying. So smile! Laugh! When you know the other person can't even bend in the slightest because their pride is in the way, this is when you can show them just how stupid they really are. Smiling back at them will infuriate them!
I used to do this when I worked as a teller at a bank. When a customer would get pissed because they overdrew their account; they'd almost always start yelling. I would have nothing to do with it but somehow it was always the tellers fault. So, I would direct them to customer service with a smile and a head tilt. I was young and cute so it would make them even angrier because this little 18 year old teller was kindly telling them to take their bum ass over to a CSR and duke it out with them. A smile went a long way whenever someone would try to cash a check that didn't have funds in the account. Again, my fault the money wasn't there. I became known as the teller that could "kill 'em with kindness" because I always smiled no matter what!
So I say SMILE! IT CONFUSES PEOPLE! And please! Let me know if you have any success with this!!
I used to do this when I worked as a teller at a bank. When a customer would get pissed because they overdrew their account; they'd almost always start yelling. I would have nothing to do with it but somehow it was always the tellers fault. So, I would direct them to customer service with a smile and a head tilt. I was young and cute so it would make them even angrier because this little 18 year old teller was kindly telling them to take their bum ass over to a CSR and duke it out with them. A smile went a long way whenever someone would try to cash a check that didn't have funds in the account. Again, my fault the money wasn't there. I became known as the teller that could "kill 'em with kindness" because I always smiled no matter what!
So I say SMILE! IT CONFUSES PEOPLE! And please! Let me know if you have any success with this!!
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
I can't cook...
I have never been proud to admit that I am not the type of girl that can slave over a stove and cook up a feast for 20 people (or two for that matter) that is delicious and good looking all at the same time. I sit back and watch my mother just throw ingredients into a pot with her hands, knowing just how much to grab and I am always searching for the measuring cup and still screwing it up!! My only blessing is that I am Italian so I made it a point to at least learn how to cook those dishes. Anything else is off the table. Literally. I tried meatloaf one time and really... it was disgusting! You know it's bad when the dog even spits it out! I am in total envy of a woman that can cook, bake and make fabulous dishes all in a days work. Maybe that's my problem... I work too much and thus, can't get enough cooking time in to learn. I swear though, I can do a mean PB&J!!
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Moving is no fun
So I'm moving right. Ok, no big deal, no? HELL YEAH IT IS! I fucking HATE packing! URGH it is the most mindless task in the world aside from watching that little ball on your desk go back and fourth, waiting for it to stop. I love to unpack, redecorate and make my own little spaces mine, but the packing up and getting it done... I have no choice but to procrastinate until I am under the gun. I find I get more done that way then doing it over a period of time. In one fell swoop, my mind is focused and running a mile a minuet because I now have time against me and this makes me fly faster through the obviously loathed job of packing. Packing everything from stupid little things I've accumulated over the years to the very things that make me, ME... I just HATE it. Lets get this over with, shall we?!
Monday, December 6, 2010
You need a muzzel
Sometimes, I just want to reach across the counter at the people serving me at a fast food joint and strangle them. Either they're 16 years old and have no idea what the concept of cash back means or they're in their 50's/60's working for minimum wage and hating every moment of it.
Today, I took my mother out for a day of retail therapy. She and I both needed it. We've been through a lot these last few months with people playing mind games, pitting children against us and using every means possible to track what we're doing and finding ways to push us down even more. I called her up and told her "today, we're going out!". Towards the end of our shopping spree, we both noticed that we hadn't eaten anything all day so we went to the local pretzel factory to grab in a good munchie and a drink. The older woman behind the counter took my order first (even though Mom and I were ordering together). I asked for a simple plain pretzel. My mother asked for an "almond pretzel" but when the woman reached for the pretzel in the display case, my mother stopped her. "Do you think you could give me another one? This one looks like it has been sitting for quite a while". The woman behind the counter gave her this stare that I certainly did not like; you know that look someone gives you when they think you have three heads because they can't comprehend what it is that you're asking of them. Still, she pulls the pretzel out of the case and holds it up to her face, like she was inspecting it. Looking at my mother, she just continues to stare and then turns her eyes to me. "Don't you haven't anything more recent?" I asked. "That looks old and I wouldn't want to eat it." The woman in the back preparing the other pretzels stated that we'd have to wait for about 15 minuets before another almond pretzel would be available. My mother, who is starting to become hard of hearing, asked for the young lady in the back of the room to repeat herself but since I had heard her myself, I just repeated to my mother "they won't have any for a bit". The older woman at the counter, STILL HOLDING the old almond pretzel like an idiot holds a pencil, stares at her. "Well, then do you have something else?" my mother asks. "Like what?" Asked the woman. At this point, I am getting pissed. Her tone of voice, her body language and facial expression all said to me that she thought my mother was half stupid for asking for a fresh pretzel. "We have salt pretzels." she said. My mother asked her to repeat herself one more time, as the noise in the mall was loud and even I could barely hear her. "Salt." the woman said "S. A. L. T."
When she did that, I about lost my mind! I knew then she was not going to like what I was going to say next. She even glanced at me, knowing she had crossed a line and tried a smile at me to check to see how receptive I was of her nasty and condescending tone. I did not smile back and she knew she was in trouble. After ordering up our drinks, I handed my mother the pretzels and told her to go take a seat at a table behind us, that I would be over in a moment after I treated her to her pretzels.
"$9.95" the woman said to me.
"I did not appreciate the way you spoke to me mother" I said .
"I'm sorry, I didn't know-"
"You knew exactly what you were doing, and frankly it was rude and wrong. One of these days, you're going to come across someone who won't be as reserved as I and they'll really rip you one."
I took my drinks and turned to walk away, with her shouting behind me "I'm sorry, I didn't know-"
to which I turned and said "You knew EXACTLY what you were doing and I didn't like it."
After that, she was a nervous wreck behind the counter. I was watching from my table. All of a sudden, she became this pleasant, upbeat, kind "order taker". Where was this kind, caring, laughing soul when we came to visit her? She wasn't there. Finally, telling someone off actually HAD an effect!!!
Rachel -1
Pretzel Bitch -0
Today, I took my mother out for a day of retail therapy. She and I both needed it. We've been through a lot these last few months with people playing mind games, pitting children against us and using every means possible to track what we're doing and finding ways to push us down even more. I called her up and told her "today, we're going out!". Towards the end of our shopping spree, we both noticed that we hadn't eaten anything all day so we went to the local pretzel factory to grab in a good munchie and a drink. The older woman behind the counter took my order first (even though Mom and I were ordering together). I asked for a simple plain pretzel. My mother asked for an "almond pretzel" but when the woman reached for the pretzel in the display case, my mother stopped her. "Do you think you could give me another one? This one looks like it has been sitting for quite a while". The woman behind the counter gave her this stare that I certainly did not like; you know that look someone gives you when they think you have three heads because they can't comprehend what it is that you're asking of them. Still, she pulls the pretzel out of the case and holds it up to her face, like she was inspecting it. Looking at my mother, she just continues to stare and then turns her eyes to me. "Don't you haven't anything more recent?" I asked. "That looks old and I wouldn't want to eat it." The woman in the back preparing the other pretzels stated that we'd have to wait for about 15 minuets before another almond pretzel would be available. My mother, who is starting to become hard of hearing, asked for the young lady in the back of the room to repeat herself but since I had heard her myself, I just repeated to my mother "they won't have any for a bit". The older woman at the counter, STILL HOLDING the old almond pretzel like an idiot holds a pencil, stares at her. "Well, then do you have something else?" my mother asks. "Like what?" Asked the woman. At this point, I am getting pissed. Her tone of voice, her body language and facial expression all said to me that she thought my mother was half stupid for asking for a fresh pretzel. "We have salt pretzels." she said. My mother asked her to repeat herself one more time, as the noise in the mall was loud and even I could barely hear her. "Salt." the woman said "S. A. L. T."
When she did that, I about lost my mind! I knew then she was not going to like what I was going to say next. She even glanced at me, knowing she had crossed a line and tried a smile at me to check to see how receptive I was of her nasty and condescending tone. I did not smile back and she knew she was in trouble. After ordering up our drinks, I handed my mother the pretzels and told her to go take a seat at a table behind us, that I would be over in a moment after I treated her to her pretzels.
"$9.95" the woman said to me.
"I did not appreciate the way you spoke to me mother" I said .
"I'm sorry, I didn't know-"
"You knew exactly what you were doing, and frankly it was rude and wrong. One of these days, you're going to come across someone who won't be as reserved as I and they'll really rip you one."
I took my drinks and turned to walk away, with her shouting behind me "I'm sorry, I didn't know-"
to which I turned and said "You knew EXACTLY what you were doing and I didn't like it."
After that, she was a nervous wreck behind the counter. I was watching from my table. All of a sudden, she became this pleasant, upbeat, kind "order taker". Where was this kind, caring, laughing soul when we came to visit her? She wasn't there. Finally, telling someone off actually HAD an effect!!!
Rachel -1
Pretzel Bitch -0
Sunday, December 5, 2010
I never have enough middle fingers
With all the bitches in my life, I can never seem to find enough middle fingers to go around these days. In one area, I walked away from the bitch of bitches thus removing myself from the rest of her pod; and on the other hand walking away never gave me the opportunity to tell them how I really felt. Years of persistent and purposely induced isolation, lies and fabrications about my characters followed by the ultimate betrayal; the "I love you" phrase that everyone needs and wants to hear. I have learned never to say these words unless they are truly meant. It can be so damaging to someone when they learn "I love you" was said out of pure hatred and, even humor; thinking it is funny to lead someone to believe they are loved when they're not. I am what I am and I have learned that approval is not needed from anyone by any stretch of the imagination. You either love me for me or just get the fuck out of my life. Period. No more petty games, no more "I'll talk to you later's" and then don't, no more playing to see who can piss me off the fastest. That's pretty much over. The only thing I wish I could do is shove my middle finger in your face and tell you what a petty, dirty, disgusting person you are for all that you intentionally do. I dare you now, try me. Try me now.
Movies
I hate watching a movie with someone who has a big mouth and has already seen it one hundred times to the point where they know the script front to back. So what was almost a fun movie experience turns into a blabbering nightmare of "oh wait, here comes the good part" and quoting the punch line before it actually is punched. I know who I would like to punch in that particular situation. Seriously... if you have seen a movie and want to watch it again, do so with tact PLEASE. Must you HAVE to show how nerdy you really are by quoting the movie all the way? No please, spare me your knowledge. I'll be more likely to walk away and watch the movie alone than have Happy Know-it-all tell me the story line by line!!
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Old People Lie too!
Alright, so I am waiting in line for a prescription for my son who has a terrible ear infection. I have one woman in front of me (besides the one at the counter). Then, her "friend" appears, all old white hair, big fat black sun glasses, long coat WAY too warm for the weather down here... They get to talking. I'm thinking to myself "If this old bat tries to get in front of me I swear..." . The old woman who approached her friend said something about me being behind her, to which to other old fart says "you're with me". I'm thinking "oh HELL NO. You fucking old bitch, your time is not any more valuable than mine!" But I wait. I wait and give the old "ladies" the benefit of the doubt. Never do that! Then, the person at the counter leaves and up walks the line jumper. Oh I couldn't hold my tongue any longer. "Excuse me" I said "I believe I was before you". The other old fucker says "she's with me." "Oh really?" I ask, "are you buying your prescriptions together?" and they give me a look that could have shot me cold "yeah" and turn, shaking their heads at me. Here's the problem. She wasn't buying her prescriptions at the same time, she fucking LINE jumped ahead of me because I'm young, I'm pretty and she thinks the world owes her a big fat everything on a silver platter.
After the line jumper steps out of line, so did I and I got right in her face "You lied." I said "You bold face lied. You're time is no more precious than mine you old fucker. I have a five year old at home in agony. Let that rest on your conscience. And if you can lie to a complete stranger like this, what on earth can you do to those closest to you? Fuck off".
Can you tell I was pissed? Maybe I could have been a little more tactful but it boils my blood when others think they are more important than the other, without knowing anything about them. It's a "I'm in my own world" world these days. Step out of your bubble people are realize that there are people out there around you're "world" that are JUST as important.
My two cents on that subject. I fucking hate liars. And I hate OLD LIARS worse.
After the line jumper steps out of line, so did I and I got right in her face "You lied." I said "You bold face lied. You're time is no more precious than mine you old fucker. I have a five year old at home in agony. Let that rest on your conscience. And if you can lie to a complete stranger like this, what on earth can you do to those closest to you? Fuck off".
Can you tell I was pissed? Maybe I could have been a little more tactful but it boils my blood when others think they are more important than the other, without knowing anything about them. It's a "I'm in my own world" world these days. Step out of your bubble people are realize that there are people out there around you're "world" that are JUST as important.
My two cents on that subject. I fucking hate liars. And I hate OLD LIARS worse.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Selective Hearing
How many of you ladies out there have significant others who suffer from "Selective Hearing"? I am, sadly, one of the millions of you who are joined at the hip to a wonderful man who suffers from this ailment. And by ailment, I mean HEAD up his ASS problem.
Tell me if this sounds familiar:
It is night time. Your kids are asleep and you and your honey are watching TV. You've been under the weather for a few days and the house is less than stellar. Yet you have company coming tomorrow and would be mortified if you're company would come into your home with it a little messy as it is currently. You think, "I can clean this up, but I would really love to go to bed". So you turn to your loved one and say "Hey, I'm pretty tired and I've got company coming in the morning. Do you think you could clean up a little before you come to bed?" In my case, my husband said "no problem, what do you need done?" (Keep in mine, we're watching Thursday Night Football. I tell him the living room and the kitchen need some TLC. He nods and off to bed I go.
I wake up, feeling refreshed and much better than the previous days and get my son ready for school... yet when I come down the steps the living room and kitchen and in even WORSE shape than they were last night! Someone thought having midnight snack of cereal would be good... except forgot I had company coming in less than an hour!
Would this not make you want to just out of your skin? If you couldn't do it, TELL ME the TRUTH and I could do it myself. False promises just to make me feel good at the time is going to infuriate me even more when I find out what RALLY happened during my sleeping hours!
So selectively, my husband heard "Clean up the living room if you get a chance" when I said "I am having company tomorrow, I need the living room and kitchen cleaned up, can you do it?".
I am just wondering if there are any other ladies (or even you young men too!!) who have spouses with "Selective Hearing".
Oh and please, this does not just stay with significant others. Mothers, Fathers, Sisters, Brothers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousin's, Boss' and every other type of people you can think of will most likely suffer this from time to time (including yourself/myself).
Just wondering....
Tell me if this sounds familiar:
It is night time. Your kids are asleep and you and your honey are watching TV. You've been under the weather for a few days and the house is less than stellar. Yet you have company coming tomorrow and would be mortified if you're company would come into your home with it a little messy as it is currently. You think, "I can clean this up, but I would really love to go to bed". So you turn to your loved one and say "Hey, I'm pretty tired and I've got company coming in the morning. Do you think you could clean up a little before you come to bed?" In my case, my husband said "no problem, what do you need done?" (Keep in mine, we're watching Thursday Night Football. I tell him the living room and the kitchen need some TLC. He nods and off to bed I go.
I wake up, feeling refreshed and much better than the previous days and get my son ready for school... yet when I come down the steps the living room and kitchen and in even WORSE shape than they were last night! Someone thought having midnight snack of cereal would be good... except forgot I had company coming in less than an hour!
Would this not make you want to just out of your skin? If you couldn't do it, TELL ME the TRUTH and I could do it myself. False promises just to make me feel good at the time is going to infuriate me even more when I find out what RALLY happened during my sleeping hours!
So selectively, my husband heard "Clean up the living room if you get a chance" when I said "I am having company tomorrow, I need the living room and kitchen cleaned up, can you do it?".
I am just wondering if there are any other ladies (or even you young men too!!) who have spouses with "Selective Hearing".
Oh and please, this does not just stay with significant others. Mothers, Fathers, Sisters, Brothers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousin's, Boss' and every other type of people you can think of will most likely suffer this from time to time (including yourself/myself).
Just wondering....
Scorned
"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned..."
No phrase written on the face of the earth could not have been more true. And believe me, a woman doesn't necessarily get scorned by her lover. She is lied to and back stabbed by her best friends, her family and sometimes, she is her own worse enemy. Backing a scorned woman into a corner is bound to have some most violent and turbulent consequences. I have had a lifetime of lies thrown at me, as we all well know, by people I trusted with my life. And in doing so, I lost parts of my life I can never get back and wish I had followed that little voice in my head that said "don't listen to her, she isn't telling you the whole story". When you trust blindly as I, you are destined to become a furious, scorned woman. There are parts of me that throw up my past and let the wind take it away. "See you never!" I would say. Then, there is the other part of me; the anger and betrayal that I feel, that wants my revenge. My Fury can't get me what I want. To tell her she's a bitch, that she is a perfect example of WHY I do not trust anyone. If someone is so powerful that their lies are able to craft someone else's main existence then there is nothing one can do about it; unless they realize their problem as physiological and seeks professional help. But I doubt that. People in "power positions" like this tend to feed off the high they gain after they tell their lies and they are believed.
So go on with yourself. You've tried to take me down and tried to ruin me. You have only made me more aware of myself, my priorities and truth in love and lies. I know how to read people and their true intentions. Thanks to you, no one can be fake to me; because I have known fakeness my entire life. Go pity on yourself. Feel "sorry" for what you didn't do... blame yourself to those who will listen. I know it is just an act and you feel nothing. In the end, I believe your goal is to be alone. Now that I am out, who is next to go?
You've got to pick someone....
No phrase written on the face of the earth could not have been more true. And believe me, a woman doesn't necessarily get scorned by her lover. She is lied to and back stabbed by her best friends, her family and sometimes, she is her own worse enemy. Backing a scorned woman into a corner is bound to have some most violent and turbulent consequences. I have had a lifetime of lies thrown at me, as we all well know, by people I trusted with my life. And in doing so, I lost parts of my life I can never get back and wish I had followed that little voice in my head that said "don't listen to her, she isn't telling you the whole story". When you trust blindly as I, you are destined to become a furious, scorned woman. There are parts of me that throw up my past and let the wind take it away. "See you never!" I would say. Then, there is the other part of me; the anger and betrayal that I feel, that wants my revenge. My Fury can't get me what I want. To tell her she's a bitch, that she is a perfect example of WHY I do not trust anyone. If someone is so powerful that their lies are able to craft someone else's main existence then there is nothing one can do about it; unless they realize their problem as physiological and seeks professional help. But I doubt that. People in "power positions" like this tend to feed off the high they gain after they tell their lies and they are believed.
So go on with yourself. You've tried to take me down and tried to ruin me. You have only made me more aware of myself, my priorities and truth in love and lies. I know how to read people and their true intentions. Thanks to you, no one can be fake to me; because I have known fakeness my entire life. Go pity on yourself. Feel "sorry" for what you didn't do... blame yourself to those who will listen. I know it is just an act and you feel nothing. In the end, I believe your goal is to be alone. Now that I am out, who is next to go?
You've got to pick someone....
It's the most Fucked up Time of the Year!
Yes, I am talking Christmas. Spare me your Euell-tide greetings, fake hugs and gifts. I know this is all just a showcase of who can buy the most to make themselves look the best and there-for, the most loved. Pah-lease. You sicken me.
Not to mention this season never brings out the best in our fellow human-beings either. Pushing, shoving, fighting in the toy store for that stupid little ELMO that their kid HAS to have or they'll simply die. Really? REALLY? Of Elmo-withdraw? I know I want to give my precious child everything I can for Christmas, but I'm not about to push, shove and elbow someone else to get it! "Please" and "Thank you" have been forgotten and have been replaced with "get the fuck out of my way bitch!" and "I was in line first!". So much for patience, kindness and caring that the season was built on (besides the mythical Character of Santa Claus that wiggles his nose and his fat ass can fit down any size chimney to put gifts under a Christmas Tree that ignite thousands of house fires a year!). The spirit of Santa Claus is NOT mystical, however. He stands for giving, kindness and thoughtfulness that we humans tend to forget all year round until, WHOOPS! It is Christmas! Time to get gifts for everybody (even if we don't like them, it is politically correct). Well no, how about you just suck up your guts, grow a pair and just be a nice person for once? Or is that too much to ask?
I love Christmas and it's season... with my FAMILY. and I am talking just my SMALL, unique family that hold my trust which consists of really only 6 people (including two friends I call family). Otherwise, the rest of them can fuck off because it's a competition and not a holiday of love, joy and togetherness. If I was not given ONE gift for Christmas but knew I was loved, that would be enough for me. But for some, getting the gift is their confirmation to their insecurities that they are loved. Well... there might be a reason for that but... that's another blog post.
Anyway, for real reasons, I hate this holiday season. People kick and scream, yell and bitch and moan. Some people actually have the gaul to tell someone "I don't like this gift, do you have a gift receipt so I can take it back and get something I do like". SERIOUSLY. I kid you not. I have seen it happen!! I am astonished at some peoples inability to take a gift for the thought behind it and not the product itself.
Then again, that might be asking too much...
Not to mention this season never brings out the best in our fellow human-beings either. Pushing, shoving, fighting in the toy store for that stupid little ELMO that their kid HAS to have or they'll simply die. Really? REALLY? Of Elmo-withdraw? I know I want to give my precious child everything I can for Christmas, but I'm not about to push, shove and elbow someone else to get it! "Please" and "Thank you" have been forgotten and have been replaced with "get the fuck out of my way bitch!" and "I was in line first!". So much for patience, kindness and caring that the season was built on (besides the mythical Character of Santa Claus that wiggles his nose and his fat ass can fit down any size chimney to put gifts under a Christmas Tree that ignite thousands of house fires a year!). The spirit of Santa Claus is NOT mystical, however. He stands for giving, kindness and thoughtfulness that we humans tend to forget all year round until, WHOOPS! It is Christmas! Time to get gifts for everybody (even if we don't like them, it is politically correct). Well no, how about you just suck up your guts, grow a pair and just be a nice person for once? Or is that too much to ask?
I love Christmas and it's season... with my FAMILY. and I am talking just my SMALL, unique family that hold my trust which consists of really only 6 people (including two friends I call family). Otherwise, the rest of them can fuck off because it's a competition and not a holiday of love, joy and togetherness. If I was not given ONE gift for Christmas but knew I was loved, that would be enough for me. But for some, getting the gift is their confirmation to their insecurities that they are loved. Well... there might be a reason for that but... that's another blog post.
Anyway, for real reasons, I hate this holiday season. People kick and scream, yell and bitch and moan. Some people actually have the gaul to tell someone "I don't like this gift, do you have a gift receipt so I can take it back and get something I do like". SERIOUSLY. I kid you not. I have seen it happen!! I am astonished at some peoples inability to take a gift for the thought behind it and not the product itself.
Then again, that might be asking too much...
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